Sunday, November 16, 2008
My thoughts n feelings have been quite a rollercoaster the past few days. From the time I went into the airplane in Chiang Kai-Shek Airport in Taipei, until now im resting in NUH, I felt that God is the one who is always with me. Its through this period I grew closer to our Lord Jesus Christ.
What happened was I did not have good sleep over in my university NTUST and it resulted in me doing all sorts of funny n weird things. The doctor diagnosed me as having "Bipolar Disorder". It is a disorder that affects the mind and about 1 in 200 develops such a disorder. The symptoms are so applicable to me, like increased activity,decreased need for sleep, overactive thoughts and reckless behaviour.
My poor sleep was a result of many factors. These factors include Homesickness, Frens in my dorm not as caring as i tot they should be, Mattress too hard and also I was feeling too excited about what I can do tomorrow. This disorder affected my ability to think and act rationally. I was so nervous about each day and every small thing which others say or talk bout in front of me made me think even more. In the end I "胡思乱想” and did some stupid things. I rather not talk bout it.
Anyway my brother was very nice and he took urgent leave and flew to Taipei to see me. I was in the hospital and he helped me settle all my luggage and ticket and everything else. At that time I still wanted to stay in Taipei because my exchange was supposed to be until 20 Jan 2009. By Gods plan, I came back to Singapore on Thur 6 November 2008. Thats bout 2 months plus before the intended time. I was upset I could not say my goodbyes to my Taiwan frens. My Gou Di, Sa Sha, Lulala frens, ROck Band frens, the cute skatergirl, my soccer frens, my church frens. So many frens I have made over jus 2 months. Though the friendship isnt deep, it is nice and memorable.
As for now, I am still unsure of what I should do next. My frens n family in Singapore tell me to stay, but my heart tells me to go back to Taiwan. This is the rare chance to experience life and experience overseas life to the fullest. I want to do more outreach in primary schools. I want to learn even more in my piano and drums. The most important thing is the freedom to be myself. In Sg, it is a very organised and nice place. However, due to the workload and CCAs I joined in NUS, plus church commitments and frens request, I do not have the time to pursue the things I really wanna do. In Taiwan I just be myself and I pursued my interests like Piano, music and girls. :)
Anyway, Angorians or Christians reading this, please keep me in prayer. I need direction as to my heart's desire to go to Taiwan, whether is it to play or really do mission. Pray for my attitude n mood to be better if i do go back to Taiwan. The last thing I want is to go thru the same cycle of sleep lost, mood swings and then resulting in me doing stupid things. Ok last but not least, I will continue to soar to greater heights in whatever I am doing, for the Lord is my Engine and Strength. :)
What happened was I did not have good sleep over in my university NTUST and it resulted in me doing all sorts of funny n weird things. The doctor diagnosed me as having "Bipolar Disorder". It is a disorder that affects the mind and about 1 in 200 develops such a disorder. The symptoms are so applicable to me, like increased activity,decreased need for sleep, overactive thoughts and reckless behaviour.
My poor sleep was a result of many factors. These factors include Homesickness, Frens in my dorm not as caring as i tot they should be, Mattress too hard and also I was feeling too excited about what I can do tomorrow. This disorder affected my ability to think and act rationally. I was so nervous about each day and every small thing which others say or talk bout in front of me made me think even more. In the end I "胡思乱想” and did some stupid things. I rather not talk bout it.
Anyway my brother was very nice and he took urgent leave and flew to Taipei to see me. I was in the hospital and he helped me settle all my luggage and ticket and everything else. At that time I still wanted to stay in Taipei because my exchange was supposed to be until 20 Jan 2009. By Gods plan, I came back to Singapore on Thur 6 November 2008. Thats bout 2 months plus before the intended time. I was upset I could not say my goodbyes to my Taiwan frens. My Gou Di, Sa Sha, Lulala frens, ROck Band frens, the cute skatergirl, my soccer frens, my church frens. So many frens I have made over jus 2 months. Though the friendship isnt deep, it is nice and memorable.
As for now, I am still unsure of what I should do next. My frens n family in Singapore tell me to stay, but my heart tells me to go back to Taiwan. This is the rare chance to experience life and experience overseas life to the fullest. I want to do more outreach in primary schools. I want to learn even more in my piano and drums. The most important thing is the freedom to be myself. In Sg, it is a very organised and nice place. However, due to the workload and CCAs I joined in NUS, plus church commitments and frens request, I do not have the time to pursue the things I really wanna do. In Taiwan I just be myself and I pursued my interests like Piano, music and girls. :)
Anyway, Angorians or Christians reading this, please keep me in prayer. I need direction as to my heart's desire to go to Taiwan, whether is it to play or really do mission. Pray for my attitude n mood to be better if i do go back to Taiwan. The last thing I want is to go thru the same cycle of sleep lost, mood swings and then resulting in me doing stupid things. Ok last but not least, I will continue to soar to greater heights in whatever I am doing, for the Lord is my Engine and Strength. :)
Labels: 1 week Back in SG
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